The Great Outdoors

When I think of myself now, I don't at all consider myself an outdoorsy type of person.

But looking back at my childhood, I do actually think I used to be pretty outdoorsy. My house growing up had a lot of land, and I remember running around the woods with my best friend from (waaaay) across the street, climbing trees, "swimming" in the creek that flooded my other neighbor's yard when it rained, making "pottery" from good ol' NC clay we dug up, and hanging in her awesome tree house. I think we were probably outside exploring more than we played inside (without a care in the world about snakes, spiders and other creepy crawlies that were undoubtedly crossing our paths, unbeknownst to us).

And not only that, but I have fond memories of camping way back when I was in girl scouts and church youth group. I definitely did more of the cabin and platform tent camping on cots at girl scout camp, which I loved. What's not to love about one big weekend- or week-long sleepover with friends in the middle of the woods, with a lake to swim in and a campfire to roast marshmallows?

What I tolerated, but never loved though, was camping on the hard ground in tents in the middle of nowhere and peeing in the woods in the dark. Especially after an unfortunate incident at a girl scout sleepover in my back yard, where my mom later told me she discovered a snake had crawled under our tent at some point and was directly underneath us as we slept! ::shudder::

Ultimately, I think I got my fill of camping when I was younger and fully outgrew any urge I may have had to sleep in the woods. I've become far too accustomed to my pillow-top mattress, temperature-controlled and bug-free house, and indoor plumbing just steps away from my bed.

But this? This makes me {almost} want to pop a tent right here on the edge of the lake and stay forever--comforts of home be damned.





While my kids aren't in scouts and don't have free reign over woods to explore or creeks to swim in like I did, they do have awesome grandparents who bought a pop-up camper, rented a spot at Jordan Lake, and took Aidan and Logan for a two-night camping trip.



Adam, Lorelai and I took the boys out there last Monday to drop them off and have a cookout on the lake.





For two days, they fished, canoed, cooked over a campfire, whittled sticks, hiked, and just generally enjoyed nature. Pure and simple.



Granted, the camper isn't as rustic as sleeping in a tent (it has a TV, sink and stove!) but I'm so glad Aidan and Logan were able to experience camping. In fact, I'm kind of jealous of them, despite my previous utter lack of desire to go camping as an adult.





Maybe when Lorelai is a bit older, we'll look into getting a tent and "roughing it" (with air mattresses, because let's be real:)) for a great outdoors adventure.

Well done, mother nature. Well done.




PS: with the exception of noiseware and a bit of added contrast on the silhouette photos, all of these are unedited iphone photos. Boom.

One last beach hurrah for the year

Before the official end of summer, we had one last beach hurrah.



Adam and I took Thursday and Friday off of work, packed up the kids and my mom, and headed down for a nice long weekend of sun and sand.



Well, there was lots of sand, but the sun decided to hide for half the time. Clouds and rain be damned, we still had a good time.





It was a great way to say goodbye to summer and kick off our three week fall break from school.





Luckily the weather was still warm, despite the clouds. But we did have our fair share of chattering teeth and blue lips after playing in the water for a while. The water was actually pretty warm, too.




I find such peace and joy, just sitting on the beach, watching and listening to the waves crash while the kids squeal with laughter.



We saw dolphins in the distance and pelicans diving for fish. A kind fisherman down the beach showed the kids his impressive haul of bluefish.



Adam and I were talking, and we got to wondering whether people who live at the beach take it for granted. If that's what happens, then I'd never want to actually live at the beach. Because it would be such a shame to take for granted something so beautiful, powerful, calming, dangerous, peaceful, fun, scary and exciting.



For the record, Adam was totally on board with my whole "never living at the beach" thing, because he doesn't exactly share my appreciation for it. Four days was more than enough at one time for him. :) I on the other hand, cannot wait to go back next summer for another long(er?) weekend!



And now I can officially say "bring on fall!"

Life lately

So it looks like I've unintentionally abandoned my blog for the past couple of weeks. I'd love to share our latest beach pictures. I'm sure they're great, but I have no idea because I haven't even gotten the camera out of the case since we unpacked.

Life's gotten in the way--between our beach vacation, work being as crazy as it's ever been for me, and the rest of the proverbial shit that's hit the fan recently, I haven't had the time or the mental capacity at the end of the day to do anything other than veg in front of the TV or sleep. That is, when I'm not jumping out of bed at 11pm to send some urgent emails I thought of while I was trying to fall asleep but couldn't because my brain wouldn't quiet down. I've felt more stress these past couple of weeks than I can remember in a long time. I know I have to keep swimming, but I'm having trouble keeping my head above water.

So in bullet point form, here's what's been going on in my world. Quite a bit of ups and downs last week...

• We went to the beach for 4 glorious days!
• I've had to eat my words (twice!) about how Logan has turned the corner, because he basically did this again last Monday. But more scary this time, because of all the morbid thoughts he was verbalizing. Drop-off at his trackout program was...let's just say rough...and 30 minutes later I was back to pick him up because he was threatening to run away from them. The teacher had to physically restrain him from leaving the room.
• On Tuesday, I was moved to tears by a coworker who noticed that I was having a really rough day on Monday (crying about Logan in the hall at work was a dead giveaway...embarrassing) and delivered these flowers to my desk to try to brighten my day. It worked!

• That night, while Adam was out of town for work, Logan got upset at me again and acted like he was trying to suffocate himself. In my heart I know he didn't really mean it and I know he couldn't have actually hurt himself that way, but it scared Aidan (and me) to tears.
• Wednesday I called my Employee Assistance Program hotline for a referral to a child psychologist. I don't know what's going on with Logan, but I'm worried so I have to do something. Anything.
• Then I engaged in some retail therapy during lunch because I just had to get out of the office for a bit, and ended up with these cute polka dot pants I found on the clearance rack at Target. Score!

•  And then last Thursday, Adam lost his job. Gulp.

(And just to add insult to injury, on Friday, I came down with a cold. Seriously?!)

Now that the initial shock has worn off, we're doing okay. Adam's okay. I have faith that he will find a new job that's better than his previous one. He's so good at what he does and well-respected in his field that I shouldn't be worried. But it's the uncertainty that's scary right now. How long will he have to go without a paycheck?

As much as I'm complaining now, I know I'm not special. Lots of people have lost their jobs or their pay because of the furloughs. Lots of people are working (even more) insane hours alongside me right now. Lots of people have issues with their kids.

And really, I know we'll be okay in the end. We're lucky because we have our health (knock on some serious freakin' wood!). We're lucky because we're not immediately in a dire financial situation. We're lucky because I still have a job, regardless of how insane it's been lately. We're lucky because we have each other and a supportive family.

"When life gets you down do you wanna know what you've gotta do? Just keep swimming..." ~Dory

We'll be okay.

Backpack obsessed + a Yak Pak giveaway

Remember how Lorelai seemed so jealous of the boys when we were back-to-school shopping? She had her own backpack picked out and everything. For at least a month, every time we walked by the backpack section, she'd point to one and say "I need that" (heavy emphasis on the need). I always put her off by saying "you don't need that now, we'll put it on your birthday or Christmas list" and moved her along.

So when Yak Pak contacted me about reviewing one of their products, of course I jumped at the chance and knew exactly what I wanted to get. I chose the deluxe backpack in this fun star pattern (the purple was a must for Lorelai) and it's safe to say my girl is obsessed.



The first thing Lorelai did with it was pack it up with her baby doll, teddy bear, blanket, shoes, plastic kitchen fruit--you know, the essentials ;)--for a day trip to Grandma's house. Then we used it again last weekend on our trip to the beach. It's obviously big on her now, but it's a great size to hold whatever she needs for short trips away from home, and she'll grow into more by the time she goes to kindergarten in two years. The material is nice and sturdy (much better than the cheapo backpack we got Aidan and had to return...TWICE...to Target) so I know it'll last for a while.


Whoa, a glimpse into my future with her first day of school photo or what?!


But don't even try to tell Lorelai that she has to wait two years. As soon as she loaded up her backpack, she headed straight to the car saying, "okay, let's go to kindergarten now!"



Oh girl. You may be ready for that, but I'm SO not. Let's just stick to pretend kindergarten with your cute backpack for now. :)




Would you like a chance to win a YakPak product? Not only do they have cute backpacks and messenger bags in lots of fun patterns, but they've got lunch totes, pet accessories, headphones, iphone cases and more. Just enter via the Rafflecopter form below. Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Full Disclosure: I was provided the backpack for a review. All opinions are my own.

Summer 2013 bucket list wrap-up

With summer officially coming to a close in less than a week (noooo!), I figure it's about time I recap all the things we did on our bucket list, some of which I never blogged about. Doh!

Unlike last year, we completed everything on the list. Unfortunately, you'll have to take my word for the fishing and the sparklers. The boys went on a fishing trip with the grandparents so I wasn't there to take pictures (bummer, because I'm sure the pics would have been so stinkin' cute! Adam and I will have to find time to go with them sometime...). And we did sparklers on the 4th of July when we were waiting in front of Target for the fireworks to start, but it wasn't really dark yet, and since we were in a parking lot, the only 2 pictures I took were lame. Maybe this weekend at the beach we can try again?



Anyway, we really did have a great summer and I'm super sad to see it go.

• We played in the rain
• We went to a baseball game
• We made ice cream (but need to do it again...many times...for sure!)
• We went to the beach
• We went to the movies (twice--Monsters U and "Despicable Moobie" as Lorelai says)
• We made lemonade (several times, so yummy!)

We also ran through the sprinkler and had some water balloon fights. Two birds, one stone...twice! Once at the beginning of the summer when their cousins from Atlanta were in town.





Oh, how we love seeing them, and wish it could be more often. The kids always have so.much.fun together!





And then again at Lorelai's birthday party. I think that might have actually been three birds with one stone, because that ended up being the most perfect activity for a party I was completely stressing about. (Thanks to Desiree for that awesome suggestion!)




Pay no attention to the weeds and dirt we call a back"yard." We've since done some patch seeding and it's looking...maybe a little bit better?





Since our summer break from school is only 5 weeks long, it's easy to feel like we got gypped out of a "real" summer. But darned if we didn't make the most of it, even after the boys were back in school.

Although many of these are things we probably would have done anyway (some probably not!), it's nice to put them in a list that we can check off and look back on to see that we really did make a lot of great summer memories.

Jinx and vomit

I probably should have knocked on wood after I wrote up such a lovely birthday post for Logan, talking about how he had turned a corner with the meltdowns and was handling his feelings a little bit more appropriately. Either I had totally selective memory while I was caught up in my birthday nostalgia, or I totally jinxed myself.


I wrote the first half of that post the day before his birthday, but by the time I had written the rest and was ready to post, he was already proclaiming his day ruined and he was having the worst birthday ever. Dramatic much? And this is what happened when I dared to ask for a photo with the child I birthed from my loins 7 years ago on that day.


How dare I?!?


Unfortunately, during a total cluster of a time trying to get a tantruming Lorelai down for her nap, Logan got yelled at (not by me! Orange Rhino FTW!). And even though I tried to calmly remedy the situation, it spiraled out of control. He stormed up to his room, said he was going to throw away all his presents, and said all kinds of hurtful things to me like "you don't love me! You never love me!" It was certainly nowhere near as bad as his temper tantrums have gotten in the past, but it was extra hurtful because it was on such a special day, and I truly, honestly, was nothing but sweet and comforting to him when he got upset. (Side note: I'm giving myself mad props for not having any kind of mental breakdown or screaming match from all of the tantrums going on. Deep breaths...)

On the plus side, he came out of it fairly quickly, and was all better by the time his cousins came over so they could enjoy some quality time eating pizza and brownies and playing Skylanders on the Wii.

But...BUT! It wasn't all sunshine and birthday unicorns from there on out. By 9pm, he was writhing in pain on the bathroom floor with a horrible stomach ache, and then proceeded to puke up his entire dessert. Because of course. Of course Logan couldn't have been spared, on his birthday no less, from the vomit that has plagued our house for what was now the 3rd weekend in a row. First Lorelai, then Aidan. I should have seen it coming for Logan from a mile away. Sure, I think it had much more to do with the 3 chocolate donuts, a few slices of pizza and one monster-sized birthday brownie he scarfed down over the course of the day as opposed to whatever Lorelai and Aidan had. But still. 3 kids, 3 weekends of puke. Lovely.

We're all better now, so if Adam and I can make it through this weekend without either of us throwing up, maybe our "lucky" streak will be broken. Fingers crossed. Toilet bowls thoroughly cleaned, just in case. :)


PS: I have to say that I really do think Logan has turned that corner. And no matter what this post sounds like in my effort to document our reality--both the good and the bad--I meant every single heartfelt word I said about him. Just in case that didn't go without saying.

PPS: For the record--he done went crazy again this morning when I asked him to be more helpful like Aidan. Apparently what he heard was "I hate you, Logan." Sigh. 

Seven.

Happy 7th birthday to my sweet, charming, shy, funny, friendly, sensitive, crazy, athletic, smart, loving Logan.



I don't want to jinx myself, but I kind of feel like Logan has turned a corner in this last year. The meltdowns are less frequent and less intense, which is a huge deal. He's still sensitive and gets his feelings hurt pretty easily, but he's learning how to handle that better. And his teacher told me the other day that he was really "adaptable and go-with-the-flow." Say what?! Music to my ears, for sure.

He's doing amazingly well in school. Blowing his assessment scores out of the water, in the top learning group for each of his subjects (reading, spelling and math) and really seeming to enjoy it. When I asked him if he was raising his hand in class to participate, he said yes. When I asked if he got the answer right, he gave me a coy little smile and said "I always get the answer right." I love seeing that confidence coming from him.

He's still so good with his sister, loves playing with Aidan, and makes friends left and right. He's maturing right before my eyes, and I love seeing this glimpse of the man he could turn out to be.



Some other things I want to remember about Logan at age 7:

• He's into Skylanders and Pokeman, making a beeline straight there with no hesitation when birthday shopping with Grandma and Grandpa. He's also into Legos like his brother, and they're still saving up for the Death Star together.
• He likes reading Flat Stanley, Captain Underpants and Frannie K Stein books. He's got excellent reading comprehension and reading fluency (MClass level K; goal for beginning of 1st grade is E), but he still prefers to be read to at home.
• He's much less inclined to spend his allotted technology time sitting on the couch watching a TV show--he'd much rather watch Adam play his League of Legends computer game.
• He's still super athletic, although we don't have him in any organized sports right now. I think we might try basketball this winter.
• He's a whiz at arcade games, just like his dad.
• He can seriously chow down on some food. I swear, he eats burritos and bananas Conehead style!

*******

I totally dropped the ball this year and didn't plan any kind of official party. Instead, his special request was to have breakfast at Dunkin' Donuts and go to Adventure Landing to play some putt-putt and arcade games.



We had a great time, just the five of us (ahem, no matter what Logan says to the contrary after his feelings got hurt during a Lorelai tantrum...). And tonight we'll have a pizza party with Grandma Ellie and cousins Shaun and Raina. Low key, but enjoyable.



To my Logie-lou, I couldn't be more proud of you if I tried. You're an amazing person, and I'm so excited to continue to watch you grow and learn. Tonight at 5:40, I'll hug you tight and remember the moment you came into this world and into my life, changing it forever for the better. I love you more than words.


Cheer up, buttercup! It's your birthday!