Pictures of Halloweens Past

My last post inspired me to take a trip down memory lane and reminisce about Halloweens past--from my pre-blogging days. I even had to dig up some backup CDs for the first 3 years, so it was nice see baby Aidan and baby Logan pictures again. :)


2004: Aidan was the cutest darn Elvis I ever did see! The idea was inspired by his naturally crazy hair. Also, my first-ever homemade costume, woohoo. He got rave reviews (although people also thought he looked like Evel Knievel, which I totally get).






2005: My mom made this pumpkin costume when my sister and I were little and it was handed down to me for Aidan. Not sure he was a fan. :)






2006: Dalmatian and Fireman. I painstakingly sewed every one of those felt dots to Logan's costume and made Aidan's coat out of a sweatshirt and duck tape. Duck tape is magical. I had some time on my hands while I was out on maternity leave that year.





2007: Matching tigers. If I remember correctly, this was Aidan's request. Those tails ended up in their dress-up bin and have been worn countless times. Another ode to the magic of duck tape!







2008: Ninjas. Also known as the first year I bought costumes from the store and saved myself a bunch of time.





2009: Batman and Superman. Logan actually got that costume for his birthday because he wanted a cape so freaking bad. Another addition to the dress-up bin.





2010: As much as I wanted to find coordinating costumes for all three of them, Aidan and Logan insisted on superheroes again. Of course Logan being Wolverine (aka Logan) was perfect. Aidan was Venom. And I went the easy route with Lorelai and just stuck a bunny bib and some felt ears on her can called it done. Cutest bunny ever, though!





And then there's 2011 (the most random collection of costumes...until this year) and last year.

Ah, memories. I'm such a sucker for cute baby pics. :)

Glimpses

Every now and then, I catch glimpses of Aidan and Logan that transport me back in time to when they were little.

Just yesterday, Aidan cocked his head to the side and gave me this exact same look. In that split second, he was 4 years old again.


October 2008

And Logan with his puppy. Oh, that puppy. He's been attached to this thing since he was a baby. And to this day, he still likes to sniff/rub it against his lip when he's upset or tired. Every time I catch him doing it, he looks like a toddler to me.


(Left) almost 2; (Right) 15 months


In those glimpses, I feel sad that they're not so little anymore. And then I feel guilty—as if them being older is a bad thing. It's not a bad thing, just very bittersweet. I love who they are now and who they will become, but I'll always be incredibly nostalgic and miss the time when they were my sweet, snuggly baby boys.


(Left)Aidan, 10 months old, 2005; (Right)Logan, 9 months old

Five on Friday

Seems like random thoughts are about all I can manage these days, so here are a few more coming atcha on this Fine Friday (which is all the more fine knowing I don't have to work tomorrow after all, yay!).


ONE.
Lorelai was barely in the Three's class for a month before she could recite the pledge of allegiance by heart. I finally realized that I should record her saying it. (I actually did record her saying it last month on instagram, but 15 seconds wasn't quite enough time for her, so I recorded it again today.) I've also caught her singing God Bless The USA. She's a patriotic little thing. :)

TWO.
We decided on Halloween costumes, but both Logan's and Aidan's involves some DIY action that Adam has been hard at work putting together. Lorelai, on the other hand, lost her mind over a Minnie Mouse costume at Target and wouldn't take No for an answer. At least hers was easy--swipe card, and done.


THREE.
I'm so excited that Scandal is back on, but I'm not used to having to wait a whole week between episodes, after binge-watching the first two seasons. Speaking of TV, how great was the Walking Dead premier? I can't wait to see where this season goes. And I think I'm still bothered by some of the past few Sons of Anarchy episodes. That's another seriously intense and great show. 

via                                                                                                              via

  

FOUR.
I've been stress eating lately and I'm so not happy about the extra few lbs I've packed on recently from eating ALL THE CARBS! :( But I've been back to Zumba for two weeks in a row now (after a shameful 6 month hiatus), so hopefully I can get back on track with my exercise and get motivated to eat healthier.


FIVE.
We've amassed quite the collection of Chick-fil-a happy meal books, and while I was reading the latest about pandas, I couldn't help but think about this and crack myself up.

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Now I'm off to watch Scandal and Grey's Anatomy, as per my regular Friday night ritual. TGIF, ya'll!

Tidbits

>>>The sun finally came out today after over a week of mostly cloudy/rainy days. I think what I dread most about Fall is the days becoming shorter. I need sun in my life.




>>>What I initially thought was going to be a few hours of work last Saturday turned into almost a full 8 hours total of work. Conference calls while my kids played (and Lorelai threw a tantrum once) in the backgroud, included. For the record, Saturday software releases SUCK!



>>>Aidan and Logan started back to school this week after their fall break, and the transition was tougher than normal, for Logan especially. While it was really great bonding time, I think them being home with Adam for two full weeks almost spoiled them so they weren't as ready to go back as they have been in the past. They wanted to keep doing all kinds of fun things with daddy. But we're settling back into things. Homework included, ugh!

>>>Lorelai's daycare was closed for Columbus Day on Monday so she and Adam had some quality daddy/daughter time. They went to Starbucks, the library, watched a movie and went for a bike ride to the bus stop. Fun times.



>>>This came up on my Timehop app recently from when Aidan was 5, and gave me a huge giggle all over again. :)



Happy Tuesday, which means it's almost huuuuummp daaaay! I'm not ordinarily as happy as a camel about Wednesdays, but tomorrow is movie day at work. Woot Woot!

The Great Outdoors

When I think of myself now, I don't at all consider myself an outdoorsy type of person.

But looking back at my childhood, I do actually think I used to be pretty outdoorsy. My house growing up had a lot of land, and I remember running around the woods with my best friend from (waaaay) across the street, climbing trees, "swimming" in the creek that flooded my other neighbor's yard when it rained, making "pottery" from good ol' NC clay we dug up, and hanging in her awesome tree house. I think we were probably outside exploring more than we played inside (without a care in the world about snakes, spiders and other creepy crawlies that were undoubtedly crossing our paths, unbeknownst to us).

And not only that, but I have fond memories of camping way back when I was in girl scouts and church youth group. I definitely did more of the cabin and platform tent camping on cots at girl scout camp, which I loved. What's not to love about one big weekend- or week-long sleepover with friends in the middle of the woods, with a lake to swim in and a campfire to roast marshmallows?

What I tolerated, but never loved though, was camping on the hard ground in tents in the middle of nowhere and peeing in the woods in the dark. Especially after an unfortunate incident at a girl scout sleepover in my back yard, where my mom later told me she discovered a snake had crawled under our tent at some point and was directly underneath us as we slept! ::shudder::

Ultimately, I think I got my fill of camping when I was younger and fully outgrew any urge I may have had to sleep in the woods. I've become far too accustomed to my pillow-top mattress, temperature-controlled and bug-free house, and indoor plumbing just steps away from my bed.

But this? This makes me {almost} want to pop a tent right here on the edge of the lake and stay forever--comforts of home be damned.





While my kids aren't in scouts and don't have free reign over woods to explore or creeks to swim in like I did, they do have awesome grandparents who bought a pop-up camper, rented a spot at Jordan Lake, and took Aidan and Logan for a two-night camping trip.



Adam, Lorelai and I took the boys out there last Monday to drop them off and have a cookout on the lake.





For two days, they fished, canoed, cooked over a campfire, whittled sticks, hiked, and just generally enjoyed nature. Pure and simple.



Granted, the camper isn't as rustic as sleeping in a tent (it has a TV, sink and stove!) but I'm so glad Aidan and Logan were able to experience camping. In fact, I'm kind of jealous of them, despite my previous utter lack of desire to go camping as an adult.





Maybe when Lorelai is a bit older, we'll look into getting a tent and "roughing it" (with air mattresses, because let's be real:)) for a great outdoors adventure.

Well done, mother nature. Well done.




PS: with the exception of noiseware and a bit of added contrast on the silhouette photos, all of these are unedited iphone photos. Boom.

One last beach hurrah for the year

Before the official end of summer, we had one last beach hurrah.



Adam and I took Thursday and Friday off of work, packed up the kids and my mom, and headed down for a nice long weekend of sun and sand.



Well, there was lots of sand, but the sun decided to hide for half the time. Clouds and rain be damned, we still had a good time.





It was a great way to say goodbye to summer and kick off our three week fall break from school.





Luckily the weather was still warm, despite the clouds. But we did have our fair share of chattering teeth and blue lips after playing in the water for a while. The water was actually pretty warm, too.




I find such peace and joy, just sitting on the beach, watching and listening to the waves crash while the kids squeal with laughter.



We saw dolphins in the distance and pelicans diving for fish. A kind fisherman down the beach showed the kids his impressive haul of bluefish.



Adam and I were talking, and we got to wondering whether people who live at the beach take it for granted. If that's what happens, then I'd never want to actually live at the beach. Because it would be such a shame to take for granted something so beautiful, powerful, calming, dangerous, peaceful, fun, scary and exciting.



For the record, Adam was totally on board with my whole "never living at the beach" thing, because he doesn't exactly share my appreciation for it. Four days was more than enough at one time for him. :) I on the other hand, cannot wait to go back next summer for another long(er?) weekend!



And now I can officially say "bring on fall!"

Life lately

So it looks like I've unintentionally abandoned my blog for the past couple of weeks. I'd love to share our latest beach pictures. I'm sure they're great, but I have no idea because I haven't even gotten the camera out of the case since we unpacked.

Life's gotten in the way--between our beach vacation, work being as crazy as it's ever been for me, and the rest of the proverbial shit that's hit the fan recently, I haven't had the time or the mental capacity at the end of the day to do anything other than veg in front of the TV or sleep. That is, when I'm not jumping out of bed at 11pm to send some urgent emails I thought of while I was trying to fall asleep but couldn't because my brain wouldn't quiet down. I've felt more stress these past couple of weeks than I can remember in a long time. I know I have to keep swimming, but I'm having trouble keeping my head above water.

So in bullet point form, here's what's been going on in my world. Quite a bit of ups and downs last week...

• We went to the beach for 4 glorious days!
• I've had to eat my words (twice!) about how Logan has turned the corner, because he basically did this again last Monday. But more scary this time, because of all the morbid thoughts he was verbalizing. Drop-off at his trackout program was...let's just say rough...and 30 minutes later I was back to pick him up because he was threatening to run away from them. The teacher had to physically restrain him from leaving the room.
• On Tuesday, I was moved to tears by a coworker who noticed that I was having a really rough day on Monday (crying about Logan in the hall at work was a dead giveaway...embarrassing) and delivered these flowers to my desk to try to brighten my day. It worked!

• That night, while Adam was out of town for work, Logan got upset at me again and acted like he was trying to suffocate himself. In my heart I know he didn't really mean it and I know he couldn't have actually hurt himself that way, but it scared Aidan (and me) to tears.
• Wednesday I called my Employee Assistance Program hotline for a referral to a child psychologist. I don't know what's going on with Logan, but I'm worried so I have to do something. Anything.
• Then I engaged in some retail therapy during lunch because I just had to get out of the office for a bit, and ended up with these cute polka dot pants I found on the clearance rack at Target. Score!

•  And then last Thursday, Adam lost his job. Gulp.

(And just to add insult to injury, on Friday, I came down with a cold. Seriously?!)

Now that the initial shock has worn off, we're doing okay. Adam's okay. I have faith that he will find a new job that's better than his previous one. He's so good at what he does and well-respected in his field that I shouldn't be worried. But it's the uncertainty that's scary right now. How long will he have to go without a paycheck?

As much as I'm complaining now, I know I'm not special. Lots of people have lost their jobs or their pay because of the furloughs. Lots of people are working (even more) insane hours alongside me right now. Lots of people have issues with their kids.

And really, I know we'll be okay in the end. We're lucky because we have our health (knock on some serious freakin' wood!). We're lucky because we're not immediately in a dire financial situation. We're lucky because I still have a job, regardless of how insane it's been lately. We're lucky because we have each other and a supportive family.

"When life gets you down do you wanna know what you've gotta do? Just keep swimming..." ~Dory

We'll be okay.